Meditation is simple: all you do is close your eyes, focus your attention, and breathe. But despite its simplicity, meditation is not easy. Once you close your eyes, your attention immediately gets pulled in many directions…or you notice an itch…or you suddenly feel the urge to plan dinner. To just stay and do nothing and draw your attention (again and again and again) to an anchor point (breath, counting, or a mantra, for instance) is no small feat. Obstacles to meditation are omnipresent. Here are some of the most common ones and some creative ways to solve them.
When you first start to meditate, two minutes is going to feel like a small eternity. Imagine sitting for ten minutes! Or half an hour! Your brain is going to miss your smart phone, your car radio, your coffee—whatever it is you use to distract yourself from what’s happening RIGHT NOW. And since your brain has no option but just to hang out with itself, in the beginning this slow presence is going to feel kind of boring.
What do you do? Sometimes when I don’t feel like running, I make a deal with myself: If I get my running clothes on and run one mile, I can check the box, go home, and be done for the day. Of course, once I’m out there running, I don’t usually opt out. Meditation works the same way: once you get going, it feels pretty good. The boredom fades. So make a deal with yourself: sit for ten sessions, and if you still feel bored you can opt out of meditation and try it again in another few months.
It’s tough to sit in one place for an extended period of time—you may feel a little stiff and creaky.
What do you do? Prioritize comfort when you start meditating. You do not need to sit on the floor. Sitting in a comfortable chair works great. You could even be propped up in bed (although the temptation to fall asleep may be too great there.) Make sure, though, that your seated meditation doesn’t result in legs falling asleep or muscles being pinched. Get particular about your comfort before you begin.
Although you can certainly join a meditation group, even there you are essentially alone in a room of people. Sitting and being present with what’s in your head might feel a little isolating or even lonely.
What do you do? You could make it a point to have a meditation buddy—someone that you talked to about your practice on a regular basis, so the experience feels more shared. The thing is, though, meditation will feel like a lonely endeavor initially, but eventually it becomes a place you go to find solace from the busy world of people. It moves from feeling lonely to feeling solitary. Time practicing helps you make this shift.
Distraction shows up in various forms: emotions (like anxiety or anger), desire, planning for the future, ruminating thoughts, or outside distractions, like noises, family, or pets.
What do you do? This is where the discipline of meditation comes into play: when you notice your mind has moved away from your anchor, you gently and deliberately bring it back. Some days, this will be easier and some days this will feel like you are jogging through mud. The easier practices and the more challenging practices are all part of meditation. Over time, you may find you’re distracted less. You may find it easier to stay connected to your anchor during your practice.
In my next post, we’ll look at how you can tell meditation is working and how your meditation practice might offer support for aging.
In my last post, we looked at the reasons meditation is important as we age, and I offered a brief primer on how to meditate. Starting a meditation practice can be daunting, but once you begin, you have to create a habit that sticks: the magic of meditation comes from doing it routinely.
It is not imperative that you meditate every day, although meditation experts suggest it. More important than how often you meditate, though, is that you meditate with regularity. Whether you meditate daily, three days a week, or just once a week, find your meditation time and adhere to it.
Don’t fret about how long you “should” meditate for: starting out, go for a regular meditation practice but for short intervals of time. After all, if you were training for a marathon, you wouldn’t start by running ten miles on your first day of training. First, you’d create a manageable weekly running schedule, and you’d commit to running at least several times a week. From there, you’d start with shorter runs and build slowly to running longer distances and covering more miles. It’s the same with meditation: make it a habit, and then add a little more. When you first begin to meditate, two to five minutes is plenty of time! If you do that successfully for a couple of weeks, consider adding an additional minute every few meditation sessions.
It’s just as important to have a set place as it is to have a set time. Some people enjoy having a meditation area in their home—a specific corner of the bedroom or an alcove near a window. You could put a yoga mat, meditation cushion, or candle there. That’s a nice idea, and if setting up a sacred area appeals to you, go for it. It’s also completely fine for your meditation “place” to be on the floor next to your bed—or even on your bed! Where you meditate doesn’t have to be special, but creating habits is easier when you do the same thing again and again: for that reason, meditate in the same place every time. (Of course, when you travel, this idea gets shaken up. But when you’re home, have a meditation place.)
You can vary the anchors you use: one day you might choose to focus on your breath, one day you might choose a phrase or mantra. When inspiration strikes, let it guide your practice. There will be plenty of days, though, that you won’t feel inspired to meditate on a new mantra or intention. You won’t feel inspired to meditate at all: the very act of committing to your meditation practice—actually sitting down and closing your eyes—will feel like a chore. For those days, you need a stockpile of go-to anchors. You might have a specific counting pattern you know captures your mind well. You might choose a simple mantra you use often: the word “peace” or a sentence like “breathing in, I am present; breathing out, I am here.” As you begin creating your habit of meditation, jot down a few anchors you can use any time you sit to meditate. When you don’t feel inspired, use familiar anchors.
Connect Meditation to Your Daily Life
The best way to begin—and then stick to—a meditation practice is to connect it to something you already do routinely. If you plan to meditate daily, perhaps you can sit down right after you brush your teeth every morning. You’ll use your already ingrained habit to trigger your soon-to-be-ingrained habit—and meditating with minty breath may even help you stay alert! Or maybe you unwind at night by reading. You can still do that, but sit in meditation first. If you have a daily or weekly yoga practice, add a few minutes of meditation before or after your practice. Instead of making your meditation practice something else you have to do, connect it to something that you’re already doing.
In my next post on meditation, we’ll explore some of the common obstacles and examine how you know when your meditation practice is working. (Preview: are you meditating routinely? It’s working!)
Props are an important aspect of a yoga practice. They make some poses more available, some poses more challenging, and many poses kinder for our bodies. In my previous posts on props, we’ve looked at the uses for straps and blocks. This week we look at the sweetest of props: yoga bolsters. Bolsters are versatile, but all of their uses come back to their name: they bolster you. You can sit on them, use them as padding, and relax onto them in supported and restorative poses.
Try sitting on a bolster with your legs in a sweet criss-cross position or try using the bolster as a saddle. Either way, you’ll probably notice that sitting on the ground is a lot more comfortable. You can use a bolster to lift your hips a little higher in any seated yoga pose.
Padding or Propping
Bolsters can be used to pad knees in poses like low lunge. They can serve as props for your hips in poses like pigeon. In a sweet resting pose like child’s pose, they can be used under your head. Any time the ground feels too far away from your body, use a bolster to fill the gap.
My favorite use for the bolster is as a prop for restorative yoga and supported poses. Bolsters can give your upper body a lift in supported fish and can elevate your hips in supported bridge. They can also be used in a traditional savasana pose, slid under the knees for a sweeter experience for the low back.
Along with age comes a greater appreciation for simple things—blue skies, fall colors, family. We grow more content with things as they are. Contentment with the current state of things avoids the suffering caused by avidya, or misperception, wrong-seeing. When we drop the struggle, we can find peace and contentment in the moment. Yoga describes this contentment as santosha, and it’s one of the five niyamas—the prescriptions for how to behave. This Thanksgiving, can you find gratitude for all the wonderful things you’re able to appreciate about your body, your situation, and your existence, as they are right now?